![]() |
NEED Help urgent
Hi Everyone,
I'm Kristine,26 and married to my high school sweetheart. i really love him but i have been discreetly fucking black. but the encounters are rare as i'm careful of my sophsiticate prim and proper reputation. I really want it more often and i dont want to hide it from my husband. i dont know how to tell him everything. i fear losing him. i love him and i love black too what should i do, how can i tell him and not lose him |
be honest with yourself and let hubby know or live a lie hiding things.
|
Tuff decision
Honey Bunch , you need to look inside yourself , and determine what you really want in life that will make you feel complete, fulfield and satisfied. either continue to be a secret sub slut or find a Black man than can give you everything that you enjoy from your husband as well as satisfiy your carnal desires. I don't know for sure , but I don't think your husband is a cuck and will not enjoy the idea of another man satisfying his wife or you wouldn't have to keep it a secret. These type of situations usually lead to a major life style change depending on how you choose .Weigh the pros and cons of what you want , make a decision and STICK with it. I faced this delima 30 years ago when I got married, I had to ask myself can I truely love a white woman or should I just stick with what everyone expects and marry a black woman, well it's been 30 years
I'm still married to her and I have never regreted my decision in truth it has made me grow and come to realize my full potential. It was a bumpy road but well worth the trip ....Good luck :) |
Thankyou So much Rodd75 and Lowride58 your words give me a lot of courage
Still i cant figure out how to spill the beans |
You should check if your husband enjoy interracial sex, if he has fantasies of watching you been fucked by black men or sharing you with them... many white men would love to see their wives involved in sex with others but do not feel comfortable to share this kind of idea with them because they fear they get hurt.
I think you should find a way to tell him the truth so you will enjoy your sexual life much more then doing now Good Luck Dear! :) |
Good Luck Kristine Darling! Hope he accepts it!
My wife J. told me she loved BBC and that her two previous B/F's had been black when I proposed. She was 21 at the time. She just told me that before she answered that there was something about her that I needed to know, might not like, and could possibly even cause me to rescind my proposal! (that was a good hint wasn't it? I sorta suspected it had to do with men or a guy.) It was something that she knew she loved and wasn't sure she could live without as a married woman everafter. I told her to tell me straight up and we'd deal with it. She started with the fact that her two last B/F's were black guys, I was totally cool with that. She was relieved obviously, but wasn't finished she said.
As I recall she said something like, "And they both had huge, beautiful dicks that I loved having sex with and think about all of the time still. That's the part I'm not sure that I can promise you to give up if I marry you." Well, turns out that that was the perfect time to tell her about my G/F in college that was also very model-hot like her and constantly being hit on daily by men and women. I had found out that instead of driving me crazy jealouse like most guys, that it actually made me horny to hear about all of the proposals she would get. I ended up telling her that when someone she really wanted to do came onto her to go ahead, do it, and just tell me about it. But I digress and go too long here. I told my fiancee that surely we could make these two things mesh cohesively and that when she found a man she wanted, to go ahead, be careful, and have fun! Just come home to me and tell me all about it afterwards as soon as possible! (The sooner the better, right hubbys?) Within two weeks she was getting some and I was getting to hear and see and smell and taste and etc, all about it when she would come home from her dates. We've been doing it since ..before..we were married, and it's been GREAT! We both hope that your man is understanding, accepting, and realizes how lucky he is that you want to stay with him and occasionally fuck BBC! GOOD LUCK GIRL c&J TX USA |
Hi Kristine, :) I have the same problem as you and I have not cheated or shared my interracial fantasy with my husband yet either. I thought about leaving hints like faking an email address and sending his email pictures of black lovers and beautiful wives, but I am to scared to even do that! :( It would be so wonderful to share this fantasy, but remember it could wrong and you will loose your husband forever. That's what keeps me from taking it any further than a fantasy!
Good luck sweetie! :) Kisses, Kristy |
Kristy,
I donīt know but I donīt think sending pictures of interracial sex to your husband is a good idea. He could open them, enjoy them but not share what he thinks with you... Maybe you have to see how sex is in your marrige, how you feel the creativity of your husband about sex... Does he seem to have some kind of sexual fantasies too? Does he enjoy porn movies? Sex is so important in life that is not wrong to talk about it in a open way in a marriage and so you are going to find out what he thinks... tease your hubby, dear :) let he knows the hot woman you are. I believe that is totally normal to have sexual fantasies and it doesnt mean you are going to make them real, so I donīt think it is a problem to share them with your husband... probably, he must have fantasies too and you both can have a great time sharing them ;) why do not invite your husband to a sex shop or let him know you would love go there? Once there you could look for some black dildos (that ones that seems a real black cock) just to see his reaction (something to tease him...) Women know how to tease men ;) I wish you luck too :) |
Hello Kristine!
I think you must try to talk with your husband about his and your phantasms.Aftter that if he is ok about that propose to go to a sexy shop and buy a black dildo.Ask him to manipule it on you.Play different games with it! Sorry for my bad english.Be patient!Best regards to you and send us some pics of your black adventures! Filipe Switzerland |
kristina
I think the time to tell was before u got married,but now if u want to continue u have to come clean or convince him to explore a sexual adventure with u or share a fantasy that u have with him..some white men i know have told me how they got there wifes interesting in blkmen was to convince them to watch interracial porn,the mind is a powerful tool that can be use to plant seeds in people minds to get them interested so try planted seeds in his mind and see what happens if that don't work,please use wisdom
|
To be honest with you, it sounds like you want your cake and eat it too. That never works out when love is involved. Remember this if anything, "love last forever, lust last for about 30 seconds". Your husband sounds like he means the world to you and thats very rare in todays society to find love that is meaningful. But you can never stop someone from wanting and craving something. Ask yourself this question...would you be able to leave your husband for another man, let alone a Black man or stick to what you have now and wonder what if? It's your happiness that counts. Everything else can be figured out when time comes. Your husband deserves to know the truth as well as you having a piece of mind! Good Luck !!!
|
It can be done
But you need to progress slowly. You have to slowly inprint this idea into his head.
Some comments about his abilities, some comments about your fantasies, some porn which contains IR, get him to lick more and penetrate less, get a black dildo, show how much you enjoy it, try using it on him, etc. but most of all always show that you love him. |
This is a tough one. The other posters have given you a ton of good advice, so I will not belabor the point. I would point out to you that just as there really is no such thing as a perfect murder, there is no such thing as a 100% discreet extramartial affair. For one thing, your black stud (s?) knows that you are fucking around behind your husband's back. As the old expression goes, if two people know it, it is no longer a secret. I can think of a hundred ways your husband can "accidently" find out about you fucking black.
I tell you this not to scare you, but rather to try to have you see that the dice have been cast. You, a married white woman, have spread your legs for a black guy behind your husband's back. I hope that this will help you make a more relaxed and therefore, more logical decision, whatever that decision is. GOOD LUCK! P.S.: You obviously like the pleasures that black cock gives you. You are ultimately your own person, so why deny yourself your own pleasures? |
dont tell him
1 Attachment(s)
just let him catch you with a big dick black guy and tell him that you need more then he can give but want to stay with him. Let him watch and he will never complain. Here is what my husband looks like and next to one of my lovers he understands
|
dont tell
[honesty in marriage is not the best policy when your breaking marriage vowels...keep him happy and do what you need to do to stay happy and keep your secret a secret..:cool:
|
u r going to hurt him i was done like that let me no if u want 2 no more
|
Funny how the world works...
Kristine....
Good luck to you. Maybe hinting with an interracial video and seeing how hub reacts would be a good start. Or, take him to a adult store to buy a toy, then suggest or find a big blk one!!! How ironique the world is. I've spent the better part of the last 8 years encouragining my live in g/f to enjoy blk as you do. She has tried twice, the last being almost 2 years ago. I continue to tell her I'd like her to be someone like you. (No, not using your name exactly) but describing someone just like you. Prim, proper and professional during the day, sub to blk at night. I would then enjoy being a sub to her and her lover(s). And then there's you in this dilema.....damn. WM, 46 now in Ohio |
Kristine, You need to find out if you and another man is a turn on for him, and also plant some seeds of lifestyle changes in his mind. A safe way to do this is through sharing your dreams. Not all dreams happen in your sleep but he doesn't need to know when you had this dream of being with BBC. It may not be instint but it will make him think about it.
|
This is the best way to tell him, 1 morning grab him and tell him that you had the craziest dream, it freaked you out but made you horny at the same time, tell him you dreamed that you had sex with a black man and that he (your husband) was actually excited by it . Now you can gauge his reaction to the idea , at first he may be cold to the idea but after some time he may warm up to the idea.
Also you can always tell him you want to watch porn and go get a black on white porno and keep telling him how hot it looks watching a black guy fuck a white women |
How To NOT Destroy Your Sweet Heart
Perhaps you need to reassess what is going on with you right now?
I don't know your whole story... but once you cheat and once you do something that gives you such mixed emotions and thrills then guilt... your priming yourself to not think logically. The endorphin rush will be intoxicating... then the down guilt feeling will make you feel horrible. You may start looking for ways and reasons to make you NOT want to be with your partner so it is them driving you away (and maybe they are), or for them to be inadequate (and maybe they are). But that is usually a defense mechanism to remove guilt and to rationalize a life change. If you really love and want to stay with your husband... then you need to stop cheating on him. Telling him about it will do what? Clear your conscience? Meanwhile destroy his confidence in himself and in your marriage in an irrepairable way? Really how many couples can swing, or have a cheating husband or wife and continue indefinitely. Probably not many. Now if doing such things is something that adds some shared excitement and strengthens your committment to each other... then I guess it could work... it won't be something you'd share with your friends, his, or family... to save face for both of you... but then again who knows.... I don't know your situation. Personally, I'm a single guy, I am very attracted to women, but also find black guys hot. So I'm not in a relationship... maybe I'll meet a woman who just likes me and I'll just like her and never think of doing anything on the side and neither will she... maybe we would be so into sharing each other and our fantasies and past and so forgiving that we'd be ok with all that... and perhaps we'd experiment together. I have no idea. I'm pretty realistic and pragmatic. As far as I am concerned what a person does is usually private... but once your married you have a certain responsibility to another person (not to mention safety issues - like STDs, pregnancy issues, and just not embarassing them in some irreparable manner). I think even if you continue in secret... you run a risk of being discovered and doing great damage. Even if not discovered you risk your own health and your husbands and that is not cool - I don't care if you use condoms or whatever your still at some level of risk that is unfair to your husband without his knowledge just as it would be unfair to you without your knowledge. Some STDs do not matter much and are treatable, but HIV/AIDS and even Hepatitis can be quite life changing. My adivce... if you can't figure it out and be open (and it is probably too late for that after a person has strayed) because there is true face-saving that is needed and that will victimize both of you and be hard to repair. I think it would be better for you to just separate for a while until you can figure yourself out. Perhaps during that time period you can date whomever and whatever type of guys you like and then go back to your husband. If he wants you back. You can share with him what you have done "during your separation" and see if it is ok with him on that level. But at least that gives you both openness and both equal power in the situation with mutual respect. If this is your life long partner and sweet heart... you'd want them to do that for you right? If during a separation or you ever found out he strayed while you were together and sucked a bunch of big black cock or something... then I guess you'd be on equal terms and would like the same things... finding such things out and giving equal "permission" will be very difficult. I wish you good luck and happiness for both of you. ~s~ |
Return to Basics
We think it preferred that you & Hub get more intimate.....MUCH more.....maybe some "anal play" you could encourage him to tickle your sweet butt......Just keep it up.......Later, somewhere down the line you can mention to Hub while you are "in play" that you hear BLK men do "this or that??" & watch his reaction.......Hopefully he won't get annoyed.....
IF you know or work with BLK men, whenever their names come up you can make a comment about that........Maybe you know a wht girl dating a BLK & ask him about that ?? Go S L O W L Y ......Don't just go out & buy a BLK dildo !! Actually the best is to tell Hub about some people who were "gppd,decent folks" You heard they play around.....BEST is IF you can get him interested in swapping OR going to just "observe" a swaping party....... I suggest the 1st step is see IF he might invite another gal or guy for MMF 3-some sex.......Then go from another wht guy to mention a BLK guy........I talked my fiancee to dating a BLK guy & instructed her to do "anything" he wants to please him....I started emailing her IR pics & asked her IF she like ?? (this the opposite of your situation)......I guess this much depends on HIS background...and your relationship w/ him....... A comment on racism.......There can be a guy who may use the "n" word occasionally......May freely make a comment about a BLK guy like OJ Simpson & actually dislike him intensely.......AND still hold secret desires for IR sex.....OR at least hold those fantasies!! The best of both worlds is to continue the marriage to the man you love & get his support for you to fulfill your IR fantasies........Perfect IF you can do this in moderation......Good LUCK !! |
Ouch!!
Kristine that's a tough place to be. I'm totally not envying you right now. Being in the lifestyle is not the norm. I'm sure that there are more people that don't than do. I have asked husbands and boyfriends how do you do it? For myself its hard for me to imagine my girlfriend having sex with some other guy. I wouldn't get off watching either.
I think if you told him that you had a friend who's husband let her have sex with black guys. Tell him she confided in you. Seem shocked about it, and ask him what he thinks about that. If he handles it well tell him you've been entertaining the thought yourself. If he doesn't take it well, I guess you'll have to decide what's more important to you. You can have it all, all the time!! Good luck, Wyld |
Helllo
You should go out an dfind what you want...bring him home and let your husband catch you two together, I think he would join in it's worth going for it and skipping conversations. He may submit immediatley, it does happen and I have seen it first and second hand. :)
Good Luck in any event. |
Girls! If you need to feel him out, go buy two porn dvd's... One with white people in it, and another one with interracial cuckolding in it. Buy them used, then swap the cases, hide the other one, when you "open" your standard white porn, "oops, they made a mistake, and here I got all dressed up and had the wine chilled! Damn! Well, I'll have to take it back, but let's watch it to make it worth the trip, maybe its not so bad." You get him watching, and you'll have your answer soon enough.
|
George, I really like your innovative approach to introducing and then encouraging white married couples to the joys of an IR lifestyle involving the white wife and mother. However, in most real world cases, it's the white husband who desires his prim and proper wife to take the plunge to black, because he knows what a sweet satisfying experience it would be for her...and open her eyes to the sensual joys she has been missing out on all her life.
While there are probably far more white wives out there who secretly harbor black fantasies than we would think, but unfortunately few have the courage to stray in that direction. Most wives who have these repressed urges are fearful to mention them to their husbands...and this is often mirrored by a reciprocal feeling the husbands have who secretly desiire their wives to go black but are afraid to make their thoughts known to their wives. ..resembling a Mexican standoff. Your approach shows a great deal of promise since the invitations you extend for the various IR website groups are given as a third-party, so there is not necessarily any chance of either husband or wife knowing that one or the other has actually instigated your offer "for assistance". I know of several couples in my area who would benefit from such an introduction, but I have to be careful how we approach the subject. Perhaps we can discuss the various options in a personal message format. Thanking you again for your efforts to promote what many of us in here are striving for. Randall |
Quote:
|
Does he drink?
If so get him drunk and over a few times drop a few sentences to him when hes drunk about you fucking black guys. Don't just come out on the 1st time you try this and say your fucking black guys work up to it over a few weeks it should work out. Has time pasts (a few weeks/2 months) get him drunk again really drunk and but this time have a black guy over and suggest you have sex but want the black guy to join in. From there... i don't know. |
Well, any updates?
|
You don't say if either one of you watches porn. If not try to bring the subject up and say you wondered about the movies. Let him know it would be nice to explore it together. Watch them together and the one time get one that shows black on white and go down on him. If he likes it then start asking if he liked what he say. Depending upon what he says lead the conversation into would he like to see you do the same. Hopefully while you are fucking him. If he says yes then make him think it's his idea, set it up and go for it.
|
Just leave him.
Kristine, girl just up and leave him. Your hubby is leaving you unfulfilled or there would have been no reason to look outside the marriage. Truly you cannot love him or you would never have cheated in the first place. Marriage is about sharing your life and experiences together. As a couple my hubby and I choose this lifestyle. We share in it as equal partners. Since we both fuck other people and we know what the other spouse is doing or who they are with then it is not cheating. But fucking around without your spouses knowledge or permission is just low! Tell him before he finds out because no matter how discreet you think you are he will eventually find out. So, tell him now that you just like the idea of being married to him but you love fucking bbc. And then call your divorce lawyer.
Lisa |
Kristine, I'm a slut. But my husband knew I was a slut before he married me. Many men like having a slut for their wife, but no man likes to be made a fool of. try to introduce the idea of swinging and recreational sex to him. Watch an interracial video and see if it turns him on. He might like these ideas. He might not. whatever you do don't confess and needlessly hurt him to salve your own conscience. You might have to divorce if you can't give up the idea of having additional bbc. But you also can't hurt the man you love because of it. My husband and I were swingers when we met so for us it was no problem. I wish you well.
scamp |
Why, just why
Why do you people see the need to bump up these old ass threads? Someone always has to add their two cents to a post that has more than likely been resolved just to be noticed or run off at the mouth about some nonsense fantasy/statement that gets them off, causing an even bigger circle jerk. It never ends does it?
|
I have been on the other side of the fence. I wanted my wife to fuck hung black men. I knew she had before we met and I knew she knew I was turned on by interracial porn, so I asked her to. To my great disappointment she said no.
|
Kristine just tell him to have peace of mind.:)
|
Quote:
|
Excellent advice.
Quote:
|
honest and upfront but set the atmosphere first..while toking/drinking..
hubby prolly has the very same secret wish..R.U. KIDDIN? ALL hubbys do!
|
All times are GMT. The time now is 01:33 AM. |