[jimbrowski]

@ thickniggadick
not necessarily th case., and this is no disrespect to men with actual injuries or medical problem relating to not being able to please their wives.
First, its not necessarily a complaint; its more of a nuisance, and a turn-off;
second, I didn't come to this decision based off of the correspondence with individuals on this site; this has been a feeling I've had for the 15+ years or so that I've been in and out of the 'swinger' lifestyle;
third, and more importantly; with the exception of a few things, there's no standard way in doing things that are considered normal, so certainly there's no set standard way of doing things that are considered abnormal, such as having someone fuck your wife for whatever reason;
Let's be clear; the site is called iloveinterracial.com not ilovecuckhold.com.
In regards to dealing with the "man of the house". That title is absolute, and if your allowing another man to have sex with your wife then that title is null and void, I dont care how you try to slice it. In keeping with that, there has to be RESPECT then TRUST then UNDERSTANDING. if you want a void to respect your "happy home" or "sanctity of marriage" then you have to respect the void and his/her values as well.
In the past 15 years I've only been to 6 parties/gatherings, and out of those 6 I had 5 encounters, all of which were the women approaching me and interviewing me, so to speak.
I've also dealt with the want-to-be controlling spouses and I've heard all of the excuses as to why they need to be involved (safety, screening, pictures, video recording, etc); If you've been in the lifestyle for a bit then all of these excuses are ULTRA lame as you have to do the leg-work. How many husbands/boyfriends ask for a background check, or better still, a std panel??? Very few, if any! So again, that "man of the house" title, is fruitless.
What it all boils down to is either they're selfish, insecure, and in some cases abusive (extreme control to a certain extent is abusive), or all three; when all they need to do is be truthful within themselves.
I remember this dude that starting talking to me with his wife right next to him; I just starting talking with his wife, and he cut in and stated how I could talk with him, and how everything needed to be approved by him and such. I told him that wasn't interested at all, and that's what I've always done and will continue to do. The issue that I had with this guy and those of his ilk, was that he tried to come off like he was doing me a favor, and that I needed to be kissing his ass and grateful for him giving me a chance to fuck his hideous wife. Now, keep in mind I'm in my 20's at the time and these parties were full of women that were 40-60 year old that weren't really attractive nor did they have decent bodies. I would say there were about 20-30% good looking women at ALL of these type of parties, and this guy's wife was no exception; she DID NOT look good, and the audacity of this guy acting as if he was doing me a favor was real turn-off. Coincidentally, if anyone wants to know what turns a black man on? it's a woman that has enough confidence to approach and let us know that's she's interested.
Why should I sit and be interrogated by some schmuck because of his sordid fantasy; I refuse to subscribe to any of that.
Whether it's his, her, or a mutual fantasy, the women ultimately has to be comfortable with the void. What I do know is that if the husband/boyfriend is comfortable, and the women isnt, then the encounter probably won't happen; if the woman's comfortable, and her husband/boyfriend isnt, then the women will make that encounter happen some kind of way, even if it means going behind her husbands/boyfriends back. Accept it or not, sex is a very integral part of any relationship between consenting adults, so If a void is having frequent or even seldom sex with a wife; it will eventually develop into some kind of relationship; albeit sexual, it's still a relationship.
This has everything to do with basic logic, and how it applies, and yes I know logic is something that's severely lacking in this lifstyle.
I guess it all depends on how a couples relationship is established; whether the wife is viewed as property and (or) she's under her husbands/boyfriends control, and (or) she can't think for herself that's fine, and that's their life not mine.