I was raised in a similar situation in a small town in the South. I did have my first BBC experience in high school and had a couple of more in college but ended up marrying a white guy right out of college. Had 2 kids and looked like the typical all American family but I was cheating on him with BBCs for the 13 years we were married. Hubby was an adequate lover of average size but he never really satisfied me. Not like the black guys did. Like you, I'd have multiple orgasms with black guys and I was literally a "limp noodle" when we finished. Wore out and totally satisfied. I love the feeling of being stretched and the deep penetrstion that hubby couldn't match. Even the anal and oral was so much better with black guys.
Every month or 2 the urge would become overwhelming to fuck a BBC. I'd then go home and fuck my husband just so he wouldn't get suspicious. Eventually he found out and divorced me and I was relieved that I didn't have to sneak around anymore. That was 10 years ago and I've been exclusively with BBCs since.
Whatever you decide to do, follow your passion, what satisfies you the most, what makes you happy. Maybe hubby will be okay with you having a black lover since he really satisfies you the way your hubby can't. If he isn't then you have to decide if you want to stay and continue cheating, as I did, or if you want a life with black men who satisfy you.
My daughter, who is now 21, knew of my affairs and, as a result, has been exclusively with BBCs for 5 years now and happy with that decision.
Whatever your decision, good luck and I wish much happiness.
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