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[ancientone]

Once I gave my wife permission to have all the extra-marital sex that she wanted, when the "all" became the norm, there would be no "deal breaker." My wife found, in our marriage (open marriage) that she not only had a husband but a friend too. She could trust me to keep her safe. She had security and trust within our marital relationship. She never could trust how another female friend would take her open marriage. She was horrified that someone she knew would find out. She was a Jesus Freak. Now 35 years later she still loves to be taken and loves to share with me the accountings of her sexual encounters. Leaving Christianity behind, she has known more than a few men. I guess the key here is for your wife to realize that having intercourse is not a tie breaker. Communication is essential. Let her know that it is ok as long as she comes back to you. She needs to feel secure and safe with your arrangement.