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[JandGinSD]

That requires an extraordinary amount of trust. However, bareback sex is the ultimate goal. It feels better psychologically and physically. Being over 50, the pregancy risk is not a concern anymore. STIs, especially HIV, certainly are. That's why our pursuit is a dedicated/committed situation - for the mutual benefit of all. Test driving the flavor of the hour would be truly great, but is not practical. This is somewhere on the cusp between swinging and polyamory. Different things work for different people. The patience needed for us is not for many or probably most guys/couples. It's a big world and a place for everyone. To answer the direct question, what makes the decision is the decision to accept the lover inside finally.