Marital Dynamics

Phil_will1 · #1 (**permalink**) 10-01-2013, 02:04 PM

As a mid-30s brotha who got into white women rather late in life, I have been pleasantly surprised by how many white women find us desirable. I was 29 when I was with my first one. She was single. I have since had three other interracial experiences; two of them were married. Of the two married white women, I was seeing one "on the down-low" and the other was with hubby's full knowledge and approval (or at least acquiescence). The married one who told her hubby about us hinted a couple of times that her hubby wouldn't mind being a passive onlooker to our recreation time. She made it clear that he was straight. I wasn't totally comfortable with that, and after I did not respond a couple of times, she stopped mentioning it.

What I am curious about is how many white females are in relationships with white men, but see black men primarily for physical pleasure and to what extent their "significant others" are aware. Also how common is it for hubby to be involved and to what extent. I know that some white women get started by a hubby or B/f who encourages and sometimes even sets their meetings up.

I really have not experienced any type of interracial relationship with a mwf other than just she and I. In both cases, a pretty strong friendship developed, even though neither of us had any expectations that the relationship would become committed or exclusive. IOW, my sense is that I was more than a "BBC", but we were not and were never going to be in love.

Comments?

Mariposa Blanca · #2 (**permalink**) 10-02-2013, 12:34 PM

My hubby isn't really involved in my "playtimes". I have his blessing, but he's ambivalent about watching or being involved. He always knows where I am and who I'm with, which I like.

I currently have what seems to be a good thing going with a local guy here. I do consider him a friend, and we exchange regular emails that cover many different topics. I am not the type to want one-night stands with a guy I pick up that night in a bar, never to see again after. I would prefer to at least stay friends, and cordial, even if the "playtime" side of things ends.

A guy is never just a BBC to me. I have to be attracted to him as a whole before anything happens.

One last thing: I love my husband and am not looking to replace him or downgrade him in my life. I will never lead the guy in to think that whatever we have will be something permanent / committed. And I expect openness and honesty from him in return.

Phil_will1 · #3 (**permalink**) 10-26-2013, 06:59 PM

Does anyone else want to weigh in?

usnluv · #4 (**permalink**) 10-26-2013, 07:33 PM

We are very much a committed loving couple. We have been together for 17 years. The last two we have been living as a cuckold couple. She sleeps with who she wants, when she wants, where she wants. Her only limitation is that the men must be black. She has absolutely no interest in white men. She has one of those, and does not need or want another.

Hubby knows, and supports this lifestyle. There is no cheating. There is open and honest communications. It is common for her to be with a liver at least once a week. Sometimes more, seldom less. Hubby will watch from time to time, or wait at home. He will always clean, but not always be able to feel. That is her decision.

jvh1357 · #5 (**permalink**) 12-05-2013, 11:47 PM

Extreeemly patient-kind-selfless. Those are just a few of my husbands attributes. He taught me the need in the man equals that of the desires in the wife. Both must be met out equally. If they are to be fullfilled collectively. And as you see when a hot wife is passionately enjoying the bonds of oh so sweet ribbons of rapture with her Black King Companion- well- the need for the hubby to see the wife fullfilled and her need to be fullfilled are both tremendously great and strengths tested to the uttermost. Wherein a bond is formed between the hubby and wife that cannot be easily torn assunder.

jennifer032185 · #6 (**permalink**) 12-06-2013, 06:41 PM

We have been married 7 years and have been swinging for 4 of those years. Currently I am involved with a black man on a regular basis. My husband has full knowledge of any encounter I have. Sometimes my husband is present and sometimes he isn't. For me it is all about the sexual pleasure, but I do most definitely need and emotional connection as well. Most people are surprised when I tell them it has actually made our marriage stronger.

gatorrdw · #7 (**permalink**) 12-07-2013, 05:37 AM

A lot of the black men that my wife got involved with over the years became close friends, often taking her out to dinner and some type of event, show, movie etc.. Many times I was involved with them. There were several occasions of her going away for a week with her current lover for a vacation. The largest black cock ( a actual measured 11" and soda can thick) actually lived with us for almost 3 years, this was after our son had moved out. Heywood was as much a husband to her as I was and he often took her many places as husband and wife. GTR

jwayne199095 · #8 (**permalink**) 01-14-2014, 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mariposa Blanca

My hubby isn't really involved in my "playtimes". I have his blessing, but he's ambivalent about watching or being involved. He always knows where I am and who I'm with, which I like.

I currently have what seems to be a good thing going with a local guy here. I do consider him a friend, and we exchange regular emails that cover many different topics. I am not the type to want one-night stands with a guy I pick up that night in a bar, never to see again after. I would prefer to at least stay friends, and cordial, even if the "playtime" side of things ends.

A guy is never just a BBC to me. I have to be attracted to him as a whole before anything happens.

One last thing: I love my husband and am not looking to replace him or downgrade him in my life. I will never lead the guy in to think that whatever we have will be something permanent / committed. And I expect openness and honesty from him in return.

My ex and I had the same deal. I saw her with him but that was not a prerequisite. We enjoyed expanding our sex lives and we knew where each other was all of the time. If she happened to find someone when I was out of town, she would call me and let me know where she was and who she was with. It was a deal that we made. We were just helping each other enjoy life a little more!

vikkiem126 · #9 (**permalink**) 01-15-2014, 02:28 PM

I have been seeing a black man, with my husband's knowledge, once or twice a week for about two years. We have an emotional connection and enjoy each other immensely. Husband is not involved with us and doesn't care to be. He just knows that this relationship is something I need and he is supportive of me doing it. It has most definitely made our marriage stronger and my husband and I share a bond that I think most married people don't have with each other.

2hereknowswhen · #10 (**permalink**) 01-16-2014, 07:12 PM

It seems to me you women are married to some of the most spineless, bitch made "men" I've ever come across. These pitiful motherfuckers actually let y'all run around on them, sucking dick to and fro, calling that shit supportive? Gtfoh. Unless these clowns are getting pussy on the side, that's a bullshit deal. If you tried that shit on me, I'd get me a lawyer, divorce your ass and put you the fuck out my house- be real tempted to break your damned neck for even coming at me with that shit. I know y'all will say, "But, we agreed to it!"-- I just can't in my life see myself or any other self respecting man going along with such horseshit, unless I get her "support" in fucking around, too.

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