Interracial Forums » Interracial Forum » General Interracial Discussion

[bankerpres]

First, let us define cheating. I agree with many threads that I have seen on this website. If your spouse knows and approves then it is not cheating. So, now my question is; "What if your spouse would never approve of sex with other men, is it alright to cheat?"

[justanotherface24]

fuck yea, go for it!! you only live once.

[stinabelle]

Cheat away just understand the risk vs rewards.

[jimbrowski]

With my moral hat on; it depends on what type of relationship your'e in; of course in a marriage its not cool to cheat, and I would question a spouse that would allow the other to cheat.
My immoral hat loves cheating women; I don't know where I would be without them but I wouldn't want to be with one.

[dirtygirl]

ok im gonna get blasted.

If u r married and you dont have an open relationship then dont cheat.
Sorry but dont your vows mean anything to u.

Ok here i go on my high horse

All i know from experience is that any revelation of an affair is a devastating blow to any relationship and the ultimate betrayal. Im not sure ill ever trust again - always in back of my mind.

Yes we hear the excuses

Often the men say it's because their partner has lost interest in them, sexually.

Women most often blame a lack of emotional intimacy for why they suddenly became erotically entangled with another man.
"He understands me and listens to me in a way that my husband (or boyfriend) doesn't," is the common refrain.

Bull - go look at what your doing and think about the damage it will cause.

Dont cheat

[bankerpres]

I posted this question because I wanted to see the reaction before I stated my point. Cheating is hard to keep secret for very long. And the revelation of sexual cheating is devastating to a marriage. Cheating almost ensures that the marriage will end in divorce once the sex outside the marriage is revealed. So, I contend that situation #1: if you truly love your spouse then you should respect them enough not to cheat. However situation #2, if you marriage has degraded to the point that you no longer have that love and respect for your spouse, then get a divorce now before you cheat. A lawyer once told me that you will have more leverage in the negotiation of a separation settlement if you have not cheated. As I see it, if situation #2 is the case, then your marriage is already going to end in a divorce if you cheat and get caught, so get the divorce now while you still have the leverage. If you are divorce, then it won't be cheating. Either way don't cheat!

Fortunately my hubby and I have an agreement. We usually play together. But our agreement allows either one of us to play without the immediate permission of the other. Our only rule is that we must share the details the next time we make love. Hubby travels a lot for business and there have been a few times when I caught him fucking other women without telling me. I really felt betrayed. This lead to a new rule: hubby must collect the panties of any woman that he screws. That way when I unpack his bags and find some panties, I know to ask him about them. Hubby is usually pretty successful on his trips. His last trip, we arranged through a swinger site for him to meet up with a cuck and his wife for Friday night to Sunday (1 pair of panties). Then when I unpacked him, I found 5 more pairs of panties. Mon., Tues., and Wed., nights were ladies from the conference. Thurs. was 2 married ladies on a girls night out. I get wet thinking of my hubby sending those ladies home to their hubbies without their panties. LOL! I, on the other hand, collect the used condoms of my gentlemen friends. Only one time has that not worked for me. He was a black friend, 67 years old, that must have fucked me for over an hour but could not get himself to cum. I finally had to cry "Uncle!" I was so raw that I must have walked bowlegged for a week. It was funny showing hubby this unrolled and unfilled condom while trying to relate all the details. We share these items the next time that we are together. It makes for some really HOT love making between us.

[jedislut2k]

It's Never OK to cheat.

Marriage is about a special relationship between two people (and if you have kids, for the love of god, don't screw that up) and cheating is always wrong. So you don't get to experience a sexual fantasy, most men and women never do. If you think a simple fantasy or sexual encounter is worth screwing that whole relationship up, then you have your priorities wrong and should not be married. And if your marriage is failing, then wait until you are legally separated

Of course my views may be shaped by the fact by scumbag ex cheated on me and I divorced his ass when I found out (we were swingers, but our deal was that both of us had to be there if any one of us was having sex with someone else and the other had to approve of the partner. But he betrayed me when he started having a sex buddy on the side without me being there, or my approval, for over a year before I found out. That was too much of a betrayal for me to handle). But I always believed that marriage was a journey a couple embarks one when their relationship reaches a certain special level. And you never screw that up for any reason that is not life-or-death. But that is one woman's opinion.

[vikkiem126]

I love my husband so much I could never cheat on him. That said, he does allow me to be with a black lover once or twice a week as he knows that my lover meets needs and wants in me that he can't meet. But, I have wondered if the affair were to end would I still not cheat or would I let my needs and desires take over.

[lena4black]

Cheating is goiong to cause trouble in your marriage, that is a fact.
But the decision to cheat can sometimes save a marriage.
We all change as life goes on, we cannot be the same person we were 20 years ago, and neither can our partners. A roaring fire will eventually become a warm glowing ember of what it once was.
I do not suggest cheating at the drop of a hat, and seriously, if you are able, then you should try and work out an 'arrangement' within your marriage so you can both agree a path forward that includes you getting some Black Cock here & there.
This is not always possible, jealousy, hurt, financial & family considerations, they all play a part in the decision to cheat or not.
I love my white husband, but I no longer find him remotely sexually attractive, he & I have both changed over the years we have been married. Our relationship is such that I would describe it as platonic best friends more than intimate lovers.
I still have sexual desires, needs & wants, but they just don't involve my husband mentally of physically. I thought about divorce, but I don't want that, I know he loves me, he takes care of me financially, we have an integrated social life with our friends & families, a nice home and a good supportive friendship. But I do not want to consider that at my age my sex life is over and that I will never have the pleasure or feeling of being taken by a Black Cock.
I will admit that intially I had fed the desire for Black Cock with my own internet research, watching IR porn, a lot, joining IR community sites like Get Her Blacked & this one.
The deeper I got involved mentally, the less chance I had of ever walking away never having 'tried it'... I was 44 at the time, for a woman that is only half way through her life expectancy...I couldn't not ever have sex again, and nor should I be expected to lay back and think of England whilst my husband humped away at me...I would end up resenting him and possibly hating him for not being what I wanted, which was Black & Bigger!

I was really nervous when I first 'went Black' I carried huge guilt in my heart, but it had taken two years to get to the point where I could not go on in life without having 'tried it' at least once... But if we know anything about Black Cock, we know that you cannot just try it once and walk away. Once I had done it, I wanted to do it again, and teh more Black Cock I had in me the more I wanted.

I almost grieved about my cheating ways, but then I realised that, my marriage was only one part of my life, that I own my body and I have the right to a sex life. The question was should I break up my marriage to exercise that right. My marriage has now survived and flourished over the 5 years since I 'went Black'.

After a few months I realised that it was wrong of me to allow my husband to share my bed or see me in a state of undress anymore. I felt I was giving him false hope by having him next to me in our marital bed and seeing me naked. It felt wrong, so I set about engineering
a new way of life for us. I told him I was menopausal & had lost any interest in sex and that he should accept that our marriage was based on deeper things than sex, which had not played a part in it for a coupld of years anyway. I also explained that his snoring was affecting me as I seldom got a good nights sleep and was always tired at work.

I suggested that during the week he slept in the spare room if I had occasion to dig him in the back for snoring... he agreed and I began to wake him on account of his snoring almost every night. (and this part was the truth, he snores like a bear!) After a month or so he began to naturally go straight to the spare room. Gradually I began to 'move' his stuff in there, first his toileteries' the his work suits etc, until he really had no reason to come into our marital
bedroom for anything. Once he did, and I was naked as he walked in, I instinctively grabbed a towel and covered myself up, this shocked him, but he averted his eyes and apologized
as he left the room. I later apologized to him for reacting that way, but explained that I had gotten used to my own privacy now and I was just startled by him walking in on me without knocking first.
Since this, he almost never come in our marital bedroom & when he does he politely knocks and waits for me to open the door to him, which I always do once I am covered & I aways make sure I greet him with a smile and a freindly 'hi honey, how can I help you?'
Since going Black Only I am much more relaxed & happy in our marriage, he feels the benefit, often commenting on how me looking more happy makes him feel more happy and we never argue anymore. I am happy to link him when we are out, I kiss him on teh cheek when he sets out for work or comes home in the evening. I will also kiss his cheek to say goodnight each night when I go to bed alone.
I would say that once I had dealt with the angst of my decision to cheat I knew that it was the right decision FOR ME & OUR MARRIAGE... My later decision to Go Black Only' was inevitable and less lard to make.
I have friends now I never had before, some of these are made up friends, like susie a girl from work who left to live in another City and whom I spend the odd weekend with.
Its a little lie, but one that allows me to spend a whole weekend with a Black Man if I want to.
He never asks about her other than to ask if we enjoyed our girlie weekend. My imaginary friend Susie has young kids and so can never travel over to us fro a weekend.
Yes there are cover stories and deciept involved but so long as he is blissfuly ingnorant of what I am doing then our marriage is probably more rock solid than it ever was.

Perhaps one day I will confess all to him and put my marriage at risk in the hope he agrees to continue to be a cuckolded white husband...but for now, I cuckold him in secret.
I doubt he could accept it if I told him, so what he doesn't know actually protects him from himself, as his male ego would probably mean he would blow it all.
One day, I will be too old to continue to be sexual, and as happens, women do become less sexually attractive to men generally, we all know that.
When that day comes, our marriage will be stronger than most peoples as we have already discovered a lasting loving way to be with each other that will keep us together til our dying days.

In the meantime, I can enjoy being a Black Cock Slut and experiencing new sexual highs with ever new Black Cock adventure I have.

So for those who say marriage is sacred, think of your vows, cheating will ruin your chances of going to heaven, think of the damage it will do if he finds out...etc etc.

Well cheating definately saved my marriage, and as far as my vows are concerned, I am being true unto my husband by doing what it takes for me to stay married to him, and ladies, as for goig to heaven, girls I am taken to heaven every time I take a Black Cock inside me!!

As for him finding out, he won't, but if he does, I will tell him everything and point out that our marriage has been closer and happier than ever because of my chosen lifestyle, then I will let him choose whathe wants to do, and take the consequences of my actions either way.

But I can see us still holding hands when we are 92 !

[melissa6]

It's only ok if the following boxes are checked off:
Will it be just for sex, not emotions? Then do it.
Do you love you husband and only want some cock? Then do it.
Are you sure he wouldn't be ok with watching? Then do it.
Are you sure that you r not gonna get attached to the black guy emotionally? Then do it.

But only do it if all those answers are YES.
Melissa
PS: I love fucking black guys, but I also love my white husband. And I love it when he watches.