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[ThickNiggaDick]

Originally Posted by Hylia1272

Deep down I hate this. I want to turn it off completely. I came here and to other communities to find support and sort of help to get over it and have it pass. Instead people say things like how I have jungle fever and instead of consoling me, it drives me even more crazy. I don't even know what to do anymore. The thought of impregnation and being overflowingly filled by a black guys sperm is just something my parents could never, ever know about.

All I can say is that people need to learn how to live for themselves. People need to focus on the things that make THEM happy . . . or at least the things they THINK will make them happy . . . a full life is about some experimentation and taking some reasonable risks here and there. CHOOSE to be happy . . . and that starts with living for yourself first . . . and not for somebody else

[curious2feel]

Originally Posted by ThickNiggaDick

All I can say is that people need to learn how to live for themselves. People need to focus on the things that make THEM happy . . . or at least the things they THINK will make them happy . . . a full life is about some experimentation and taking some reasonable risks here and there. CHOOSE to be happy . . . and that starts with living for yourself first . . . and not for somebody else

Well said and wonderful advice. If she has the opportunity, act on it. It's no different than having some kinks with a white man or any man. I doubt many of us talk about our sexual preferences with our parents.

[Hylia1272]

Thank you for the good advice! The problem I'm going through is a little deeper than that. While the advice is good, I'm kind of looking for the opposite. The thing is that I don't want to want it. I really hate to want it. What I truly want deep down is not only to make my family happy and proud, but the dreams I've always had of the white husband, children, etc.

Like I sort of touched upon earlier, my sexual thoughts are at a stand still and won't seem to evolve or change as they've always have. I could be masturbating and trying to hold on real hard to a certain thought or fantasy, but it's almost like the closer I actually get to climax, the more I want to switch my thoughts to a black man, enormous penises, or the concept of being filled up by them. I do pretty good pushing those thoughts away until the tension of near climax. In the moment and the heat, I'll actually give in and as I said before, I'll totally yell out something so racy and wrong and it immediately will send me right over. Like my thoughts Switch right over to a video I've recently seen on Tumblr, where a woman keeps repeating, "Black studs breeding all the white women" as they show scenes of white girls being completely filled... Masturbating is, eh, ok I guess, until that vision forces its way into my head and I yell something absolutely ridiculous out like, "Breed me, breed me black!" They are some of the most power orgasm I think I've ever experienced, but afterwards, in tremendous guilt and regret, I wonder why I couldn't even fight the idea off. I absolutely hate that it does this to me and I don't know why.

I've thought maybe it's something biological, like maybe the large penises or the amount of ejaculation is a biological thing I want, but it doesn't necessity help the guild. I just don't want to want it, at all. But it's like the more I push it away, the more that explosion is the very moment I give in. It's been a good four months or so, and it's the only thing that sends me right over the edge. I hate it, I'm trying to move on or get rid of it, but it drives me insane with how much my body wants it, and betrays me at every chance. If I act on it, I feel like something truly bad will happen (like pregnancy).

[curious2feel]

Originally Posted by Hylia1272

Thank you for the good advice! The problem I'm going through is a little deeper than that. While the advice is good, I'm kind of looking for the opposite. The thing is that I don't want to want it. I really hate to want it. What I truly want deep down is not only to make my family happy and proud, but the dreams I've always had of the white husband, children, etc.

Like I sort of touched upon earlier, my sexual thoughts are at a stand still and won't seem to evolve or change as they've always have. I could be masturbating and trying to hold on real hard to a certain thought or fantasy, but it's almost like the closer I actually get to climax, the more I want to switch my thoughts to a black man, enormous penises, or the concept of being filled up by them. I do pretty good pushing those thoughts away until the tension of near climax. In the moment and the heat, I'll actually give in and as I said before, I'll totally yell out something so racy and wrong and it immediately will send me right over. Like my thoughts Switch right over to a video I've recently seen on Tumblr, where a woman keeps repeating, "Black studs breeding all the white women" as they show scenes of white girls being completely filled... Masturbating is, eh, ok I guess, until that vision forces its way into my head and I yell something absolutely ridiculous out like, "Breed me, breed me black!" They are some of the most power orgasm I think I've ever experienced, but afterwards, in tremendous guilt and regret, I wonder why I couldn't even fight the idea off. I absolutely hate that it does this to me and I don't know why.

I've thought maybe it's something biological, like maybe the large penises or the amount of ejaculation is a biological thing I want, but it doesn't necessity help the guild. I just don't want to want it, at all. But it's like the more I push it away, the more that explosion is the very moment I give in. It's been a good four months or so, and it's the only thing that sends me right over the edge. I hate it, I'm trying to move on or get rid of it, but it drives me insane with how much my body wants it, and betrays me at every chance. If I act on it, I feel like something truly bad will happen (like pregnancy).

I'm no expert on interracial relationships, but this is a fantasy you have. A lot of us have fantasies. I know when I'm having sex with my husband and he or I, have talked about having a third party, the orgasm is stronger. That doesn't mean we would act on it. Perhaps it's the taboo of it all. You might act on what you're feeling and find it wasn't what you were expecting.

It's nothing to be ashamed of or to beat yourself up over. If you're truly worried about it, seek the advice of a professional. I don't really think by being on this site, you will find someone to talk you out of your thoughts, it might only encourage them. But, that's just my silly opinion.

[snowwolf]

Originally Posted by Hylia1272

Thank you for the good advice! The problem I'm going through is a little deeper than that. While the advice is good, I'm kind of looking for the opposite. The thing is that I don't want to want it. I really hate to want it. What I truly want deep down is not only to make my family happy and proud, but the dreams I've always had of the white husband, children, etc.

Like I sort of touched upon earlier, my sexual thoughts are at a stand still and won't seem to evolve or change as they've always have. I could be masturbating and trying to hold on real hard to a certain thought or fantasy, but it's almost like the closer I actually get to climax, the more I want to switch my thoughts to a black man, enormous penises, or the concept of being filled up by them. I do pretty good pushing those thoughts away until the tension of near climax. In the moment and the heat, I'll actually give in and as I said before, I'll totally yell out something so racy and wrong and it immediately will send me right over. Like my thoughts Switch right over to a video I've recently seen on Tumblr, where a woman keeps repeating, "Black studs breeding all the white women" as they show scenes of white girls being completely filled... Masturbating is, eh, ok I guess, until that vision forces its way into my head and I yell something absolutely ridiculous out like, "Breed me, breed me black!" They are some of the most power orgasm I think I've ever experienced, but afterwards, in tremendous guilt and regret, I wonder why I couldn't even fight the idea off. I absolutely hate that it does this to me and I don't know why.

I've thought maybe it's something biological, like maybe the large penises or the amount of ejaculation is a biological thing I want, but it doesn't necessity help the guild. I just don't want to want it, at all. But it's like the more I push it away, the more that explosion is the very moment I give in. It's been a good four months or so, and it's the only thing that sends me right over the edge. I hate it, I'm trying to move on or get rid of it, but it drives me insane with how much my body wants it, and betrays me at every chance. If I act on it, I feel like something truly bad will happen (like pregnancy).

Interracial pregnancy is not bad.

[loverfish]

These feelings keep coming back to you despite your actions attempting to run from them. These feelings are a deep part of you; when they come knocking at the door, you need to open the door and let them in. Only in this way can you become the real you and be a peace.

[mattywhatty]

Hey - if you have these feelings you need to explore them, Life is short and all of that.

[wabill]

Be careful of the advice given on here.
Most of the members are probably men, including the females members, with their own agendas and fantasies.
And a common one is to see a pretty white girl get converted.

As touched on.
Having your fantasies isn’t a bad thing, just play them out in your head.
Trying it for real is often not what it is in your fantasy.
In someways ,living it out spoils it.

I have a much younger partner and I see how she struggles with some aspects of her life.
It will pass in time as you figure out what you want.

[myhornylittlehousewife]

it would b hard to say no and a lot funner saying yes Yes YES

[Abby84]

Is there anything you can think of that may have triggered this behavior/fantasy?